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Genesis 6:5 "The LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually."

"The heart is the foundation of behavior," says Plowman (though God said it first). She presents three truths of the sin nature in relation to children (though all of us fit into them).
1. Your child is born sinful.
2. Sin is bound in the heart of your child.
3. Sin is not a laughing matter.

The third point really struck me the most. Joanna's a cute kid and when she backs away from me when I call her or drops her food on the floor, it can be really cute looking. But I have to remember that when Joanna disobeys me, it not just her breaking some little rule, her disobedience is a sin. I can't laugh when I witness my daughter sinning. And I see now, as we've let things slide (i.e. not coming when we call her) she falls into the sin even more. Now, when we call her she'll stomp her little foot down, walk backward away from us, or the more discrete "get distracted with something else." And now, we suffer for our sin in not disciplining Joanna and it's harder work to get her to obey.

Outward behaviors are merely a reflection of what is in the heart. It's easy for me to fall into teaching Joanna to behavior correctly (especially in public in order to impress people with my awesome mommy skills) but that's not the heart of the issue (no pun intended). I have to somehow, thankfully with God's help, teach her heart to be pure before God, to desire to do good, to obey, to serve and love others, etc.

Which reminds me of something else...I've also been reading Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp (another awesome book) and he says something that has really influenced me in how I view obedience. He says that obedience is not obedience unless it's done without challenge, without, excuse, and without delay. Wow!

What is discipline? My first thought is to say, spanking my kid. Plowman says that our negative connotations with discipline are why we have more of a tendency to want to avoid it. And thus, our kids become spoiled brats. However, Plowman says, "Biblical discipline involves love, the heart, and God's Word." We have to train our kids' hearts, not just their actions.

So how do we do this? What does the Bible tell us to do? DISCIPLINE and INSTRUCT. Here are three verses Plowman gives:
Eph. 6:4 - "...bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
Pro. 29:15 - "The rod and reproof give wisdom..."
Pro. 31:26 - "She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue."

So discipline is really a two sided process, punishment for wrong-doing and teaching correct behavior/attitudes. It seems like it's easier or more natural to just punish kids and expect them to be able to then figure out what they should do instead. I remember realizing that Joanna's not going to know how to do anything correctly, that old sin nature, we have to teach her what's right. And unfortunately, that's takes a lot of repetition most of the time. Patience, patience, patience.

I love to read! ...but whenever anyone asks me about a book or if I've read such and such a book I can never remember. Why? The same reason I can never remember if I've seen a movie until someone describes it to me; the same reason I can never remember a song unless it's hummed for me. But I want to be able to remember books, especially helpful books I might want to recommend. Thus this new feature on my blog...my book journal. I'll tell you what I think of a book as I read it.

I started the book "Don't Make Me Count to Three!"� while I was visiting my parents a bit ago. It's written by Ginger Plowman, a mother of two. The focus of her book is how to discipline your children in order to reach their heart rather than simply change their behavior.

The first chapter is basically just reminding us mom's what high calling we have to be mothers. She says, "Being a mom is more than being cook, chauffeur, maid, counselor, doctor, referee, disciplinarian, etc. (just to name a few). It's about molding character, building confidence, nurturing, training, and guiding. There is nothing like the influence that a mother has on her child."� It's so important to remember this especially during hard times or sick times or boring times of reading the same book or playing the same game over and over. Remember that loving our kids and showing them that and teaching them to love is really important and does take repetition, think of how patient and repetitive God has to be in loving us. When I came into this role of motherhood I really wanted to come into it working at it...how I can be the best mom I can possibly be. What's going to give Joanna the best childhood she could have imagined? Not that that means giving her what she wants all the time, but giving her what she needs.

So this is a bit of a long post for me but I process best when writing.